Call your girlfriend. It’s time you had the talk. Give your reasons. Say it’s not her fault. But you, just met somebody new. Tell her not to get upset, second guessing everything you’ve said and done. And when she gets upset, tell her that you never meant to hurt no one. And you tell her that the only way her heart will mend, is when she learns to love again. And it won’t make much sense right now, but you’re still her friend.
URGH. There are actually so many things I want to say right now. How confused I am. How pressured I feel. Everything seems to be building up on me all at once. Its fair to say, I don’t like it.
Exams is the main thing I’m shitting myself about. Hopefully, when my exams are done, i’ll look back and this blog and lol. Although I’m certainly not ‘loling’ now. My brother, friends, family, have all done so well in all of their exams. A’s, B’s and the occasional C. All my exam results are C’s and D’s. I always feel like the dumb one out of everyone. In primary school, I had the smart friends so I felt like I was too. When I got up to secondary school, i realised I wasn’t. Now, while everyone is revising for their High Tier maths, I’m retaking my Foundation Maths. They are all fast track in their lessons and I’m the one that barely scraps a pass. When I do well, it feels amazing so yes, i tend to be a ‘sore winner’. The other week in physics (the only lesson I’m in top set for), i got the highest in my class. I know i sound about seven but honestly, my teacher was so proud and i was like GAH MOTHERUCKERS GAH !
I’m constantly put down by people that do better than me and I hate it so much. lol at me getting all teary. But yeah, I just really really wanna do well. I want a nice house, a well paid job and decent clothes. I want to be able to pay for things instead of people always paying for me and that’s never gonna happen unless I do well at school - which if you hadn’t already guessed - I’m not.
I pray to God I get my 5 A*-C because otherwise, I have no idea what I’m going to do with my life. Stupid blog over - Hope everyone’s week went well and GOOD LUCK IN ALL OF YOUR EXAMS SEXIES.